New class, Recreational Chemistry, teaches students the ins and outs of making things explode

Amidst recent talk of scheduling changes and mandatory curriculum adjustments, Cherry Hill East has added several new classes to its repertoire. Perhaps the most controversial of these new classes is Recreational Chemistry (AP), a class which chemistry teacher Mr. Mite Boombaum describes as “barely legitimate enough to get by, and definitely not legitimate enough to ever be useful in life.”

However, Boombaum added, “I guess stuff like this happens, and all I can do is teach the class and pray I get through with all of my appendages still attached.”

The Cherry Hill School Board sings a different tune. “I always thought that it would be so awesome to be able to make explosions like in the movies,” Board member Erin Jones said.

Jones said that she definitely pushed for the class. “I want my kids to be able to walk away from buildings that they set on fire, like Will Smith does,” Jones said. “I guess it’s selfish of me.”

According to the description in the course selection booklet, students in this class will “have a fun, educational experience setting things on fire during lab days. Experiences include learning to make waterproof fires, blowing up various foodstuffs, and creating small-scale explosions on the soccer fields.”

William Maker (’12) said that he was thrilled to find out he is taking Rec. Chem., as the course has been affectionately nicknamed. “I don’t know why they didn’t do this sooner. My buddy Jake—he’s graduated now—he would’ve loved this. He used to buy wraps and set them on fire.”

East representatives have said that they will pass out safety waivers on the first day of classes.