Self-Love vs. Narcissism

February 14, 2021

Taking care of yourself is especially important during the month of Valentine’s Day. Self-love is this year’s goal, and Eastside wants to let you know that there is a huge difference between self love and narcissism. Contrary to what many believe as they may misconceive it as narcissism, self love is extremely important and healthy as it focuses on bettering one’s internal peace and well-being. Meanwhile, narcissism, or egoism, is the excessive amount of pride or care in one’s physical appearance and attitudes.

Judgements and opinions from others should not hold any importance in your self-love journey (Melissa Vital (’23))

Many people underestimate the importance of loving and treating yourself. According to whatiscodependency.com, “92% of people think too little of themselves, not too much, and often falling in love is merely a compensation for inner emptiness, loneliness, and shame.” Reminding yourself every once in a while that you are enough helps you to consciously avoid the need to rely on others for happiness and it is vital for good mental health.

On the contrary, too much self love that turns into feeding your ego can come off as having a high self esteem, or narcissism. Narcissism can come from many different sources. For instance, narcissists determine their self worth based on other people’s opinions or even what they say to them. A narcissist would heighten their high self esteem by gaining adoration and praise from others rather than looking within themselves for happiness. Self esteem is solely what you think of yourself, but for narcissists it comes mostly from other people. Also, many people believe that if you feel good about yourself, other people will find you confident. This may be the case, but it could also come off as having high self-esteem.

Self love and narcissism are opposites. It is important to take care and check up on yourself every once in a while internally, but focusing too much externally can lead to having an outwardly high self esteem and an inflated ego. Also, narcissists have such an obsession with themselves, they do not acknowledge their imperfections, which is different from self-love which has positive energy within yourself, but does not overblow your flaws. Studies have actually shown that narcissists have a rather low self-esteem, contrary to what they present. Once you have confidence in yourself internally, it will begin to show externally, making you natural and authentic. To make sure you are doing just enough self care, you can do things to make you happy to better your mind.

People learn what they like and do it to make sure they are taking care of themselves. If you are hesitant to practice self-care because you feel like you are feeding into overconfidence, let’s get rid of that mindset! You deserve so much!

So many people don’t realize the importance of self love and taking care of yourself. Especially during the month of Valentine’s Day people should try to focus on trying to take care of themselves.

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