Ravin’s Theory: high-fives trump all gestures

Ravin Patel ('13)/ Eastside Staff

Handshakes are great for formal occasions with teachers and parents. Hugs are ideal for family and friends. Anything beyond that is a little weird.  However, amongst the best are high fives – they work in almost every situation. Whether with the mailman, those guys from the Jersey Shore (which takes place in MIAMI?) or the overweight guy at McDonalds who orders a Big Mac super value meal with a Diet Coke, they can all high-five. This makes the high five the best universal hand gesture of all time.

It is so easy to do, although some people still do not know what to do. For example, in Gym there was a kid, “Chris”. Chris is the type of kid who took pre-calculus as a freshman; he is not the greatest athlete ever or an athlete at all for that matter. So while playing wiffle ball, Mr. Chris hits a homerun, and well, he didn’t know he hit a homerun. Everybody was going crazy… he walked the bases after somebody showed him which bases to go to. And then there’s me, waiting at home plate, to give him one of the greatest high fives of my life. Naturally, I stuck my hand out, assuming he would hit it, but he just gave it a blank stare. REALLY! How can you not know how to give somebody a high five?

But, like most people who know how to give and receive a high five, it can become really awkward.  For example, have you ever gone up for a high five and the person does not notice you wanted a high five then you have to find some way to hide that you actually wanted one? And then to further the awkwardness of the current situation, there will be another person there who just has to make it known that you got rejected.

Nowadays, my generation has taken the original idea of the high five and evolved it into the most bizarre forms. They are currently available in many complicated forms such as quick, long and “okay we get the point” long. There is a quick in the hall quick slap, close hand flick the fingers and fist bump it. Then there’s the long high five which consists of various hand slaps and knuckle bounces and elbow touches. Finally, the craziest, bizarre, biggest waste of time high fives, they start off just like the long one’s but before you know it… they start jumping all over the place, hitting each other with their chests, legs, feet.

Also, there is no age limit or restrictions on giving people high fives. Facebook should have a button on it like a poke, except it’s a HIGH FIVE.