Nap AP/H to be offered as an elective at east

Gina Villecco ('11)/Eastside humor editor

O’Schmeeza announced just yesterday morning that the elective “Nap” will officially be added to the curriculum as of next year.

Available solely to upperclassmen, the Nap elective will be offered in both advanced placement and honors levels. If one takes the class, the student will be required to take a placement test to determine which level of Nap he or she will take.

 “The process of establishing who belongs in Nap is extremely rigorous,” said guidance counselor Ms. Ashley Fenderbee. “The board was very precautious in adding this class to begin with. If not taken seriously, this could badly affect the future of East electives.”

East students will be tested on how heavily they nap, the speed of their REM (Rapid-Eye Movement), and how much they toss-and-turn while napping to verify in which class they will be placed.  

“This isn’t study-hall,” said Physical Education/Nap AP teacher, Mr. Ben Klyff. “This is Nap. We study the effectiveness and psychological advances of all things Nap. There’s a difference.”

Nap is offered only as a full-year elective.

“I think it’s a good idea,” said Sally Luna (‘13) who instantaneously dropped all her books and started napping on the floor. “I’m always practicing for Nap AP. I’m an over-achiever,” Luna announced ten minutes after she awoke.

“The students are really looking forward to see this elective next year, and so am I!” said guidance counselor Mr. Glen Westsnidge. “I might have to check it out…”

One potential Nap Honors teacher—kept anonymous upon request—leaked information detailing a probable final project.

 “The students would have to keep a diary of all their dreams in Nap throughout the whole year and eventually compile all the stories into one, finished project,” said the teacher.

Further information on Nap AP/H to be exposed soon.