My fellow Americans, it is with great sorrow that I make this solemn announcement: Everyone has stopped caring about George W. Bush. Our current president, once the Butt of every joke, the target of our displeasure, has recently ceased being relevant. The odd media outlet still reports on Bush’s waaaaaacky antics, but everyone else seems to care strictly about Obama. As many have pointed out, Obama has yet to actually take office, and consequently has no power yet, but nobody really seems to care.Bush used to stand for something. Even in the wake of his awful decisions, we could always make fun of his awful grammar and his habit of inventing or mispronouncing words. But now, without us to mock or insult him, what’s keeping Bush occupied? Besides packing up his stuff so that a man who hates everything he stood for can move into his house, I mean.

Maybe Bush is enjoying the media’s lack of focus on him. If he was willing to take a 7 week vacation when people actually cared about what he thought, right after September 11th, maybe he’s taking a break at his ranch, in Texas! You know, wranglin’ cattle, playing golf, getting shot in the face by dick cheney, that sort of thing.

Another distinct possibility is that Bush has realized that our focus has shifted from him, and is earnestly trying to get the nation’s attention. In the coming weeks, we could very well see our soon-to-be-former president juggling on the whitehouse lawn, or dressing up as a superhero to fight crime. Unrealistic for sure, but very fun to imagine.

Realistically speaking, Bush probably realizes that he’s going to fade into relative obscurity soon. The signs are all there. Nobody reports about him anymore, and even Carlos Mencia has stopped making Bush jokes. Once Carlos Mencia does not want to mock you in a poorly written comedy routine, you can be sure that you are at the end of your rope. Ol’ Dubya had his fun, but someone else is up to bat next, and he is going to have to pass the torch. If that cliche-ridden explaination did not spell it out clearly enough, I do not know what will.